Okay, some of it’s deserved. There are lots of people who want to write who have no clue about grammar, spelling, punctuation or story-telling. Some are beyond hope. Some will never be able to write; grocery lists are stretching their capabilities. Many of them find fanzine publication, and many grow to think they’re SOMEBODY at last; there their immortal words are, in solid book-style form, and a heady feeling it is. I know this feeling. I know it’s not like professional publishing for a number of reasons, not least of which is editing is usually sloppy at best.
But there are gems among the sewage and fanfiction is a good place to stretch one’s abilities and learn the craft of writing. And it is a craft, no mistake, even if the gift is there.
Fanfic writers are a quirky lot, by and large, and I include myself. Our egos can get out of hand. Some fanfic writers have an enlarged sense of their own importance. Some of us think because our fellow writers and fans of our work have applauded us, We Can Do No Wrong. Much of this perceived ego, however, is actually a disguise for fragility. Most of the writers who do not expand to original writing have a real problem with actual, real criticism. This isn’t just a function of being in a closed world of Someone Else’s Universe; one sees it in crafters v. fine artists, in crochet v. knitters, in sewing v. design and sewing, and many other creative endeavors. Most people want to create. In an ideal world, everyone’s free to, but lord and lady, some of us have no talent. Some people who love to sing have no ear. (My father was one of those. I loved his voice, throaty and deep, but the man couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket with a lid on it. It was years before I found out Abdul Abulbul Amir had a tune. He had the sense to not want to sing in concert, however. Some people never learn this.)
So it goes. But as I say, there are gems. At the worst, it does no harm and provides a creative outlet. At its best, it can teach the craft. There are professional writers’ groups who do teach, such as the coveted Clarion West Workshop, but most of these are beyond the financial affording of the average fanfic writer. The worst danger in fanfic, in my never-to-be-humble opinion, is the myopia of thinking one has crafted something wonderful while in truth, the story has gotten lost in the excitement of creative frenzy. And this is where fanfic has its greatest danger: writers who say they want criticism when what they really want is for someone to tell them how wonderful they are.
It’s a trap easy to fall into. There’s another, the other jaw of the bite, if you will, the fear of stepping out to the rejection of mainstream literature and mainstream publishers. You’ve polished your baby, and dressed it in a gorgeous dress, and many, many people have told you how lovely it is, and you’re afraid to send it out into the world where someone might say, “Sure, I’ll buy it. And let me lop off this here, and change its clothes, and gods, that funny haircut must go!” and before you know it some editor has taken charge and cut some of your favorite Purple Prose. It’s not your baby anymore. (Welcome to the Real World.) Or someone in publishing may send you the polite rejection that underneath the polite “not suitable for us at this time” tells you, “Who are you kidding, you, a writer? Go back to grocery lists, honey, You Ain’t Got No Talent.”
Likely will, many times.
Yes, it takes years to get published. One very talented writer I know online, who has gotten co-written or stuff published and self-written stories published said she has a ms. she’s been schlepping around for five years. And you aren’t going to get rich becoming a writer or an author. I know many a Nebula award winning author who works for a living aside from their well-deserved awards. Very few writers make a living at their novel writing, fewer yet get rich. The odds are against you. And me.
Which may be part of the reason why some longtime fanfic writers with real story-telling talent don’t want to venture beyond their comfort zone. They have their awards from the community, and their own levels of recognition. They make no money, but their writing is for love and for the passion for the universe they’ve borrowed, and its creatures. Sometimes it’s to say “What happened after the Canon Story was told.” Sometimes it’s to see woman-centered erotica (and make no mistake, slash is woman centered erotica in its purest form, even though usually the characters are two males and sometimes men write it and/or read it.) Sometimes writing fanfic is how one validates one’s own talents, which one is sometimes unsure of. (Am I really brilliant, or just insane?) And sometimes it’s simply an expression of writing in its purest form. “I write because I have to write.”
Why then not write original characters?
Some do go on to do this. Some who do try to hide their fanfic roots. I see this in artists and writers both. Some go to fringe publishing or self-publishing. Personally I have less respect for self-publishing than I do for fanfic fanzine publishing, because a fanzine editor can still reject one’s story or novel. (And sometimes they should.)
Rare is the writer who says, “Yes, I did this. Yes, I did this and wrote slash. Yes, I did this and went on to sell to mainstream sf (and that I can type “mainstream sf” when there was a time when there was no such thing is sometimes a thing of great amazement to me.)
In the meantime, there’s me. Yeah, it always comes back to me. Why? Not really ego, but more because I have experience in how my writing has begun to shape itself. I look back on my first ventures–which are on my page, linked to the front page–and some of them are really terrible. Some of them, not so bad. One or two, brilliant. Some is finely crafted. So you get my fanfic, warts and all.
My fanzine work is new enough that it’s not yet up, but it will be, it will be. Actually, some of it is old enough, but I need to get another Round Tuit. And some extra hours in the day.
And I’m still working on Original Stuff. The germ of it came from another writer, a talented lady with whom I had a falling out. I won’t discuss that except to say some of the best of the collaborating was exhilerating and heady stuff, and therein was a danger–a fanfic novella that wound up published likely shouldn’t have been. I was proud of that for the first few days, then started seeing editing that needed doing. Argh! And storyline and plotholes that should have been spackled before publication. Again, ARGH! But for what it was, it was fun while I did it.
A writer can fall in love with hir own words. This is why we need editors. We need people who are not afraid to tell us our Purple Prose is too purple. We need reining in sometimes. Writers hate editors. (I have edited, and editing is a skill as well, quite different from the craft of writing. And sometimes more thankless.) But EVERY writer needs editors. Bar none. We may not agree as writers with our editors–but it’s good to have them look at our work.
Because as one of my writer friends says, “If one person says you’re an ass, that’s an opinion. But if twenty people tell you you’re an ass, it’s time to shop for a saddle.” Having someone not in love with your work look at it is gold. Having someone fall in love with it after reading is worth the possible pain of rejection.
But if you start in fanfic and you are not going to venture out beyond it, don’t let the pro writers look down on you. If you’re a slash writer don’t let the other fanfic writers look down on you. Enjoy it for what it is. If it’s only a creative outlet for you, and having less than a hundred readers enjoy it, that’s good. That may be excellent. It may be all you want is your name (or nym) in print.
And if you go out into Real World writing and authoring, be proud of your roots. I am. I may not be writing the K/S that taught me I have a gift, and then taught me how to craft a story, but I’m still reading it. I’m still trying to encourage other writers. Because fanfic is a genre all its own, and fanfic writers are a powerful group of people–mostly women–who craft feminist erotica, empowering fiction which gives us a voice.
And those of us who craft K/S have evolved from the roots of K/S and said, “There is a future world where people have full civil rights and acceptance of those rights including marriage, whether they are gay, straight, bisexual, gender-neutral, transgender, pansexual, with or without disability, or even intraspecies-related. And look, here are two very strong heroic manly men who have the hots for each other–but not only that, they are friends AND lovers. Deal with it.”
So it’s also a valuable social thermometer too. Women’s sexuality has always been second fiddle to men’s. And sexuality in the US has always been a thing we as a culture have been both fascinated with and horrified by. That’s a post for another time, but fanfic deals with these issues and more…and most important, is story-telling at its purest. Ted Sturgeon used to say that story telling (paraphrased here, from memory) was about putting the hero’s butt in a trap in the first part and spending the rest of the story getting it out. That’s the essence, but there’s more to it.
Fanfic writers are venturing into the muddy field and learning the craft. Let’s applaud them for owning their own creativity, not look down on them because they’re doing it with safety wheels first.
For some of us, the wheels come off. But we never forget our first ride.
